smash (realtome) wrote,
smash
realtome

Slash kit for sale!


dyna: Hey pookie, do you subscribe to TV Guide?

smash: Nope.

dyna: Well, I see here on my friends page that next week our boyfriends are on the cover.

smash: *stutter*

smash: Unfrozen Caveman Actor and Shorty Shorty Blondie Pants?

smash: Or other boyfriends of ours?

dyna: Yes.

dyna: UCA and SBP.

smash: Must buy that.

dyna: It won't shock you to see our boyfriends together on the TVG cover, then.

smash: No. Unless they're trying to act all hetero, I won't be shocked.

dyna: Hah!

dyna: I saw a blurry image of the cover, and it seems like they might be holding hands.

smash: Oh, please God!

smash: But you're probably kidding, aren't you?

dyna: "you big hunk of superhero, you!"

dyna: "come over here and--"

dyna: "Shut up, Spike."

smash: Hee!

dyna: I am kidding. You can't see their hands. Who knows where those hands are!!

smash: But I have a pretty good idea!!

smash: *nudge, nudge*

dyna: I suppose there's no point in pretending I don't get it, is there?

dyna: Time to dust off the Angel/Spike slash kit.

smash: HA!

smash: Okay, now we have to list the contents of said kit.

smash: 1. Lube

dyna: 2. More lube

smash: 3. Thesauras

smash: (for words like "prostate")

dyna: Hah!

dyna: 4. Leather pants

dyna: 5. Handcuffs

smash: 6. Action figures

smash: 7. Things that vibrate

dyna: 8. Lubricating food items

smash: 9. Action figures that vibrate

dyna: HA HA HA!

smash: I'm laughing so hard I'm going to wet my pants!

dyna: HAHAHAHAHA!

smash: NO! Stop making me laugh!

smash: BRB!

smash: Crisis averted.

dyna: Whew!

smash: For no logical reason, I'm feeling a need to add "flip flops" to the S/A slash kit.

dyna: HA!!

dyna: Do it.

smash: 10. Flip flops

dyna: 11. Shower

dyna: 12. Tuxedos

smash: 13. Faith

dyna: Rrrrrrr!

dyna: Yes!

smash: 14. Giles

dyna: Dude!

smash: No, you weren't.

dyna: This is your wish list, isn't it?

smash: It's our slash kit.

dyna: 15. Bourbon and whiskey

smash: Mmm.

smash: 16. Guitar

dyna: Ooh!

dyna: 17. Leather sofa

smash: 18. Bed posts

smash: 19. Several Liz Phair CDs

dyna: Yes!

dyna: Spike sings along.

dyna: 20. Thumb ring

smash: Gaaaah.

dyna: 21. Cashmere blankets

smash: 22. Angel's S2 (Buffy) long-chain necklace

smash: 23. I'm thinking Spike needs a tat.

dyna: 24. Untucked white oxford shirt, worn with low-hanging jeans and no shoes

dyna: (and yes! to the tatoo!)

smash: 25. A closet full of nummy sweaters of the non-bulky, slightly fitted variety in XL and M

dyna: Mmm!

dyna: Slubby knit silk, v-neck.

smash: Right on.

smash: 26. Wesley chained in a closet, just for kicks

dyna: HAHA!

smash: Just because we can, we should.

smash: We can blame it on the sick bastards at Mutant Enemy.

dyna: Hee!

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    Okay, kids. As a few of you have noticed, realtome.com (my previous domain) has gone away. Blah blah name doesn't please me any more blah $200 to…

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